Don't stress over the wedding!!!

Robert, Don't stress over the wedding, OR the reception for that matter. My mother's comment on just having a get together was because she thought that that might be all I wanted. I want more than that. So does she. I think that she wants it more elaborate than I do though. She knows what money her and my dad have to spend and what they don't have to spend. They are planning to fork over more than I was going to ask them to, I guess they have kind of been saving for this. My dad told me that he has some money stashed away that my mother doesn't know about, this way everything will be possible. My dad always keeps a little money elsewhere and it is dipped into for emergencies and unexpected events or needs. This way my mother forgets about it and doesn't spend it. My mom may get a little crazy when planning for the wedding, but my dad will keep her down to earth. My mother and I think in different ways (you may have gathered this already) and therefore we plan differently. It will all work out. Your mom and dad: Right now they don't have any responsibilities that I can think of other than attending. You said your sisters' weddings were simple affairs. Ours will be simple also. It may now seem so because of all the decisions we are making, but I am sure your sisters went through just as much decision-making as we are having to do, you just weren't involved in it. You said Julie held the celebration at your parents home. Correct me if I am wrong, but this will be the only major difference. She still had to send announcements and figure out who to invite, what dress to wear, even if it wasn't a full blown gown. Our will be nice. Just as you said the reception is mainly for the Bride, and this is why the Bride and her parents are usually the ones that plan and pay for it. Extra relatives -- mine mainly: They are willing to help run the show. For this I am grateful. If it weren't for them, then I would be stressed out a whole lot more. My Aunt Julia has been to and helped prepare for many weddings (mostly receptions after a temple marriage). It was her idea for us to cut costs on our reception and my parents to give us the remaining money. I like this idea. Julia had a friend that she helped decorate for. They saved so much money that they could make a downpayment on a home. Julia is a real cost-cutter and I think we should utilize this ability to the max. Julia will probably be the only Aunt that I ask to help plan for things. Most of the others will be able to help make things run smoothly, this way *I* won't worry or stress so much. You shouldn't worry or stress either. This is supposed to be fun for the both of us. My parents had a temple marriage. All of her family was in Germany so they didn't have a celebration. Theirs was more of an elopement. I think this is a reason both of my parents want to make our wedding celebration special and memorable. You had said that you had gotten the impression that Scott Knell had gone up to the cabin and ended up almost bored, wishing that they had done something else. I think our reception is the same way. I want it to be a memorable occasion for the both of us. It will be one of the happiest days in our life, and the first day of our life together. You are looking forward to and planning for the first NIGHT of our life together. Both of which are important. We will enjoy the reception. We shouldn't have unrealistic expectations though. Things will NOT come off perfectly. There will be problems that will be stressing me the day of the receptions (ie the cake falling over when we cut it.) but they will all be funny in time. Crisis + time =humor. The only other people that had a Temple wedding were Mike and Barb (they got divorced) and Brad and Lexie. Others, in time attended the Temple later. You said that you are resisting a few things because we seem to be trying to pack in a whole wedding extravaganza into a reception. I don't think so.. At least I don't see it. Would you mind explaining? The book my mother got will help us a lot. It is from Deseret Book and it is called the "LDS Brides Guide." It is specifically focused on a reception following a Temple Marriage. In the fall we will look at it together. I think it will ease your mind in a lot of ways. I also think you are stressing more than I am. Did I say something to make you stress. You seemed fine before this letter. Until then, DON'T WORRY!!! Robert, I want us getting married to be a happy time. I don't want stress to detract from the joy I feel in being able to become your eternal wife. I love you. Tell me what I can do to ease any stress you are feeling. Would you rather I just planned it, or is it less stressing to involve you in the decision? THE most important issue is that we are getting married for time and all eternity. I love you and you love me, we WILL be happy. I won't allow you any other choice. I will do all that I can to make you happy, which includes reducing wedding stresses. Don't sign up in the Marines to go to boot camp. I didn't say yes so I could plan a reception. I love you and I want to be with you always, more than 3 1/2 years of active duty. This will be a special day for the both of us. If you wish, we will talk about this both now and in the fall. However, I don't want you to stress over these or any issues. If talking about it seems to do so, than I would rather we didn't. I love you, but I want you to be happy. Please reply to this as soon as you read it so I know you have gotten it. I love you and only want you to be happy. Your eternal companion, Wanda